


Romance your ego for a while

by kalothetic



Series: Enstars oneshots [1]
Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: (not clickbait!!!), Character Study, Did i mention that his mom is mentioned because she is, Family Issues, I don't know what I'm doing, Internalized Homophobia, Kaoru is affection starved, Local het has gay crisis, M/M, Mentions of homophobia, Not beta read we die, and I over analyze, and a bunch of other ships if you squint, and wants to be loved, angst except I have the writing abilities of a turtle, but I love Kaoru, his mom is mentioned, realizes hes in love with his emo band leader, really this is just a character study that grew limbs, repeat after me: Kaoru is a good character, so is Ritsu
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-06
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:55:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24570406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kalothetic/pseuds/kalothetic
Summary: It's usually Rei who doubts his own humanity, calling himself a vampire, an old man, an immortal being. But maybe he's started rubbing off on Kaoru because he's starting to question himself too. Is he a human? It's unlikely. What makes a man human is his humanity, and he seems to lack it. If he had a shred of it, he wouldn't try to find pride in breaking hearts left and right, try to love himself at the expense of others.How does his mother feel about this?He wishes he knew.
Relationships: Hakaze Kaoru/Sakuma Rei
Series: Enstars oneshots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1775923
Comments: 4
Kudos: 66





	Romance your ego for a while

**Author's Note:**

> Omg hi this is my first time writing Reikao and enstars in general so I hope I didn't butcher everything??

Kaoru Hakaze. 

When the name is brought up or heard, the first thing anyone would think of is instantly 'that lazy playboy'. And to a certain extent, that is true. Kaoru would never deny these facts because that's what they are, facts. To the outside world, to his fellow classmates, to everyone, that is what he presents himself as. A lazy playboy. A boy who skips out on his lessons and unit practices, can't own up to his mistakes and avoids responsibilities almost as much as he avoids commitment. He flirts with any female he sees and he starts his routine again. Spot the pretty girl, smooth talk your way into gaining her interest, ask her out on a date, forget her name halfway through, get slapped as your date runs away in tears. He's gotten used to the slaps, but sometimes he manages to score a feisty one who decides to throw her drink in his face and that's a little less cool. He'd also rather not think about the time he took a girl on a date not knowing she has a black belt in karate, but now he always brings up the peculiar question of "do you play karate?" when chatting up any pretty lady.

And it's easy for him. It's so easy for him. He wishes tending to his responsibilities was as easy as winning the heart of a girl in 5 syllables or less. He has every quality a girl looks for. He's extremely good looking, he dresses really nicely, he tends to use perfume instead of cologne so his smell is always pleasant, he has a nice built, he's part of an idol unit, he's rich, and he's so good with words it's almost scary, as if he's casting a spell on whoever his next victim is. What girl wouldn't fall for that? But that's all it is. They fall for that. That mask. That outside character he's been playing for so long, sometimes he forgets it isn't the real him. They like his looks and his silver tongue and his filled pockets but they never bother getting to know him from the inside. Not that he'd let them even if they tried.

Flirting, going on dates, relationships. They're all the same thing to him; a distraction. A substitute for all he's missing. If a girl compliments his voice and his looks and his talents maybe it'd fill the hole in his heart that craved hearing them a little longer from his mother and at all from his father. If a girl looks at him and he can practically see the hearts forming in her pupils often enough he'll start believing he's actually worth those looks. If he ends up getting slapped enough and screamed at enough at cried at enough he'll believe that this is not getting him anywhere and he'll never be whatever it is he's trying to be.

Who is he? What is he?

It's usually Rei who doubts his own humanity, calling himself a vampire, an old man, an immortal being. But maybe he's started rubbing off on Kaoru because he's starting to question himself too. Is he a human? It's unlikely. What makes a man human is his humanity, and he seems to lack it. If he had a shred of it, he wouldn't try to find pride in breaking hearts left and right, try to love himself at the expense of others.

How does his mother feel about this?

He wishes he knew.

He often goes to her grave. He'd get down on his knees and place her favorite flowers there, taking away the wilted ones he placed last time and throwing them away, making sure the place is as clean, and as pure, and as beautiful as she was. He talks to her. He tells her about his day, his week, how he's been. As if she was still right there, holding him in her arms, running her gentle fingers through his hair and humming a calming melody that's still on repeat in his mind. And for a few blissful moments, he's happy.

Until he's not. Because she doesn't answer him. Because she can't. Because she's dead and she'll stay dead. And she'll never answer him again. She'll never hold him, or tell him he's worth it. She'll never call him beautiful, inside and out, and tell him she's proud of him. Even if she was here, he doubts he'd hear her say it. What's there to be proud of? Kaoru is nothing anymore.

And he cries. He breaks down. And he's okay with it. This is the only time he's okay with crying, and being honest about his feelings, and not putting up walls and a fake persona to hide behind. Because he's still her precious son, he's still in there somewhere.

"why can't you tell me what to do...? I'm so lost..."

And once he's ran out of tears to drop on her tombstone, he takes his leave. But he'll come back, he always will, and everytime he leaves, he hopes the next time he comes back he'll believe he's worth her pride.

Kaoru was raised by his father after she left. His father is nothing like her, her polar opposite even. Kaoru often finds himself wondering how she ever managed to get together with this man, to love him, to marry him, to have two children with him. He's never seen him show his mom affection, and he broke the promise he once made her that he'll take care of Kaoru and his sister if something ever happens to her. As asshole and every other synonym for it is what he is.

Kaoru despises him.

His father is strict. Not towards Kaoru, though. Kaoru could get killed and it'd take his father a month or so to realize he's gone. He's strict in his opinions and beliefs. Kaoru doesn't pay much attention to his father when he starts rambling over whatever, but whenever a rare chance happens that a celebrity or someone they know of happens to come out as anything other than heterosexual, his father goes up in flames. Anger and hate present on every part of his expression and body language. Then he starts ranting over how wrong, sinful and disgusting it is.

Kaoru didn't realize he started sharing the same opinion at one point.

Or that's what he thought he was doing.

Being in an all boys school is hard enough as it is, but to also be in an academy such as the one he's in right now makes it even worse. Every boy here is flawless. It's only natural they take such great care of their appearance considering what the goals they're trying to achieve are, but still, it was new to Kaoru. He used to go to a normal, mixed school. Everyone there was average, nothing out of the ordinary. Here, nothing was ordinary.

Aside from the incredible beauty every boy in this academy seems to possess, they all also happen to not know what personal space is and equally incredible bodies. He learned that from how he's seen that they all change in front of each other after their lives, and how comfortable they are providing fanservice with each other, and how even off stage they all seem to be so naturally clingy and physically comfortable around each other.

Kaoru remembers the first boy he had met, although he can't remember his name anymore. He had shown him around, he was sweet. But one thing Kaoru remembers very clearly is how in awe he was at the boys appearance and how he kept thinking about how beautiful he was.

Those thoughts made his stomach do flips in nausea. It was disgusting. He hated himself (more than usual) for days after that incident. And he decided the only way to avoid these thoughts is to avoid the boys all together unless he absolutely can't. It's not like his father will care whether he's at attending class or not, for all her knows, his father could have sent him here just to get rid of him.

And so he fell back into his usual routine except now he had the added mindset of 'stay away from everyone at all costs'. He knew this way it's harder for him to make friends, but he's not exactly very fond of the idea of making friends with men anyway.

It was going just fine until that self-proclaimed vampire weirdo decided to swing dance his way into Kaoru's life.

But Kaoru had gotten used to him and his company by now. Along with Adonis and Koga, although he can't say he's as close to the other two. He and Adonis get along pretty well mostly because Adonis has never bothered him at all and he highly doubts the boy is even capable of it. He's polite and quiet and keeps to himself for the most part. He also respects people's privacy and doesn't pry, and he's obedient. What's not to like? Koga on the other hand, is the exact opposite. Koga is loud and brash and hot-headed, it annoys Kaoru more than it doesn't, but he's also found himself getting used to it slowly.

However, being a part of UNDEAD did not change much. It only added another thing to skip in his schedule.

Rei seems to be very interested in Kaoru and getting to understand him more, calling him the most peculiar human he's met yet and saying that despite the fact that Kaoru seems so very out there, his mystery almost rivals Rei's own vampiric mystery.

Kaoru pushes him away each time, saying something along the lines of 'I don't know what you're talking about. This is me, I'm not hiding anything.' and although it manages to make Rei leave him alone, he can also tell Rei isn't buying it. But he won't complain, Rei doesn't try to pry too much so he's fine with it. Rei in general is pretty weird.

It's only until a certain conversation happens between Rei and Kaoru that things become a little tense between them.

Rei had told Kaoru he has a brother called Ritsu who is a part of Knights. He told him how fond he is of his brother and how his brother has 'strange ways of expressing his love'. Kaoru however, judging by what else he's heard about Ritsu, can only assume Ritsu doesn't have strange ways of showing love, he just hates Rei.

Then Rei says something that makes Kaoru's stomach do gymnastics as he feels the sudden urge to run away as far as possible from this conversation.

"I truly wonder why he acts that way towards me, though. He seems to be very affectionate and loving towards his boyfriend"

Kaoru wants to ask more. He doesn't want to know for anything other than the purpose of knowledge over who to avoid.

He swallows hard and he feels like he has an entire refrigerator stuck in his throat suddenly.

"B-Boyfriend...?" he manages to quietly ask.

Rei nods, seemingly unaffected. "My dear Ritsu is all grown up and getting into relationships, aaah" he pretends to wipe a fake tear from his cheek. "it's Mao Isara, if you've heard of him. He's a part of Trickstar, a good kid if you ask me. Ritsu's childhood friend, he seems to make my brother happy, therefore I'm supportive of them".

Why is Rei so casual about this? Why is he treating it like it's a normal relationship? As if he's talking about his brother dating a girl instead of a boy. Why? Doesn't he find this gross, unnatural? Kaoru wants to speak up about it, but he can see how much Rei loves his brother and knows that no matter how kind Rei is towards him, he won't let it slide easily if he insults his precious brother in anyway. He thinks over how to word it in the most vague way possible. He can feel sweat roll down his forehead, and the room is suddenly hotter than a pizza oven.

"D-Don't... Don't you find it weird..?"

Rei looks at him with a slightly confused, slightly curious face. "Find what weird?"

'ah... Do you really have to make me say it?'

"That your brother is in a relationship... With a... Guy..."

If Rei had sensed the underlying homophobic tones to that question, he certainly didn't show it. Simply smiling. "Not at all. Dating isn't questioned here most of the time, and really, he's not the only one". Excuse me?

What does he mean he's not the only one? Does that imply more students are dating? This is an all boys school, and he clearly said that dating isn't questioned here, which means dating within the academy, which can only mean there's more people like that here.

His throat is too dry to even attempt to swallow harshly again. "... Who else?" he gains the courage to ask.

"Hm.. Let me remember... I do remember Izumi Sena and Leo Tsukinaga from Knights are together, seeing as they do not hold back on public displays of affection. There's also Mika Kagehira from Valkyrie and Arashi Narukami from Knights-" he pauses to mutter to himself more than anyone else a quiet 'I just realized most of these are from Knights' before continuing "-Eichi Tenshouin and Hibiki Wataru from Fine, and I recall Natsume Sakasaki from Switch speaking about a frustrating crush before. I'm certain there's more but this old mans memory is quite weak" 

Kaoru's expression must be as bad as he thinks he is considering the questioning stare he receives from Rei. Oh God. He can't do this. Why are there so many of them?! "Uh... Good... For them.." he quietly says, avoiding Rei's gaze yet he can still feel those crimson red eyes staring right into his soul.

He hears a quiet 'ah' from Rei's side and he squeezes his eyes shut, not wanting to be here at all. Why can't the earth just swallow him whole right now? He knows Rei figured him out and he fully expects Rei to never talk to him again.

"You know, Kaoru-kun. Perhaps you should try be a little bit more open-minded. Even I, an old man, consider myself to be doing a good job catching up with the latest movements" is all Rei says before he gets up and leaves. Leaves Kaoru alone. As he'd always been. And usually, when people leave him, he feels relief that he's finally alone at last. This time, he only feels something sick in his stomach making him want to throw up, and an incredible amount of regret.

He doesn't attend practice for about two weeks. And this time, Rei doesn't send Adonis after him. 

Kaoru is standing over his mothers grave again. Except this time the tears are already in his eyes. He's skipping class and skipping everything and ignoring everything just to be here because he suddenly felt extremely overwhelmed and needed to be by his mother, even if like this. It might sound crazy but he'll believe it anyway, by her grave, he can almost feel her warmth and her spirit. That's more than enough to ground him and give him the comfort he's so desperate for.

He sits down on his knees, not caring about getting his uniform pants dirty. It only takes a few seconds before he's crying, tears streaming down his face silently and letting the wind turn their trail cold on his face. It's nowhere near how cold his hands holding on to the usual flowers feel, the anxiety ripping through every vein.

"Mom... I'm lost again, but I guess you're used to it by now.. I want to talk to you about something, I know you would understand me more than... He would" his shaky voice manages to hold venom in it at the vague mention of his father.

He opens up to her, like he always does. Except this time, he's not opening up parts of him that she already knows. He's admitting something entirely new. That he's been thinking a lot lately, and he figured out that he didn't begin sharing his father's opinion on his homophobia. He simply created it himself as a defense mechanism when he realizes he himself is 'one of those freaks'. He kept trying to convince himself otherwise, to be disgusted by it, to replace those kinds of thoughts with any girl he can find to flirt it, because maybe if he flirts with enough girls and kisses enough girls and holds the hands of enough girls he'll stop thinking about how it doesn't compare to what he truly wants deep inside. That he didn't want something else that his father can hate him for, what he already has is enough.

But also that he realized that his sexuality will not add nor lessen his fathers cold treatment. It will remain the same. He's been straight for all his life now and his father never showed any interest, what would it change if he also likes boys? What he doesn't know won't hurt him.

This time, once he's cried enough and got it all out of his system, he didn't leave still feeling equally as lost as he was when he arrived. He didn't leave feeling even sadder than before. He left determined, and with a new sense of adrenaline pumping through his veins, and he's never been more excited about self discovery as he is right now that he's finally opened up. He feels new and different and as if a weight is lifted off of him.

He's no longer denying what he really wants.  
He's no longer going to chase after his father's approval.  
He's no longer going to run away from his responsibilities.  
He's no longer going to push people away.  
He's no longer going to break innocent girls hearts just because he's going through so many issues.

And for the first time he exits the cemetery knowing exactly where he has to go. And his walk turns into a run as he heads up to where he can start fixing things.

The sun had started setting once he's arrived, and the sky is painted a beautiful shade of orange. He enters the academy and walks towards the practice room he's been avoiding this whole time, silently hoping he's not too late.

He doesn't bother knocking, he simply asserts his dominance as a new man by coming in anyway. As soon as the door is open, his grey eyes meet red ones. Rei's shocked for a few seconds at Kaoru's sudden appearance before his expression turns into indifference. Kaoru spares a glance to the rest of the room, Adonis and Koga aren't around. Which makes this perfect.

Kaoru awkwardly clears his throat as he walks in and closes the door behind him quietly. Just because he's feeling more confident doesn't mean he isn't also feeling nervous over this, if his shaking hands are anything to go by. He turns his gaze to a floor suddenly to think what he'll say over and Rei is still staring at him except now with curiosity.

Kaoru looks up to meet Rei's eyes yet again, and he starts with what he believes to be the right thing, and what Rei needs before a dramatic explanation over the character development arc he just experienced.

"I'm sorry." he says, voice firm and face determined.

"for?" he receives and Rei genuinely looks like he doesn't know what Kaoru is apologizing for. Did he not hold a grudge against him for what he said that day? Then why did he stop sending Adonis after him? Did he just give up on dragging him to practice?

Kaoru feels more awkward now that he has to be specific, but he pushes it aside because this is what he's here for and he's not going to run away from his mistakes and responsibilities anymore.

"I'm sorry for what I said that day, when you told me about your brother. It was ignorant of me. I'm sorry I never come to practice and you have to send after me, I know it's stressful for you and I'll have to apologize to Adonis too. I'm sorry I never gave you a chance to really become my friend despite how much you tried, it didn't go unnoticed. Just unappreciated. And I promise I'll change all of that and do my best to deserve my position in Undead, and to deserve being your friend." he ended his dramatic apology with a bow. He doesn't know why he did that, but give him a break he's never apologized for anything ever.

He could feel his whole body trembling as both anxiety and adrelina collide in his system and he has his eyes shut just waiting for Rei to finally, finally speak up and he feels like he's going to cry because he can almost hear his mother telling him she's so proud of him and that's all he ever wanted.

He hears Rei's soft laughter and instantly jolts up straight as a stick to see why's he laughing. Was there something wrong with what Kaoru said? Is Rei laughing at him? This was a bad idea he really should have thought this through a little more. His gaze falls to the floor again and this time he doesn't attempt to hide the fact that he's 2 seconds away from his second crying session of the day.

He stiffens when Rei's hand is on his shoulder and Rei is closer to him than any man's ever been and Kaoru is actually feeling something real. Rei's smile is mesmerizing, his gaze so soft and so fond and the orange sunset behind him is making his features look so ethereal Kaoru wishes he had enough painting skills to capture this moment on canvas and cherish it forever.

"first of all, you didn't have to apologize for anything, Kaoru-kun. But.. I appreciate it. A lot. I know it's hard for you and this is a huge step forward, and that is amazing of you" Kaoru's shoulders aren't tense anymore. "and I'm really happy to hear that you'll be joining us in practice now, it's awfully boring without your presence" Kaoru feels himself smiling. "despite what you may think about this old man, I'm quite observant, and I could guess a lot of the things you were struggling with. I never forced you to talk about them, because I believed you'd open up on your own once you're ready" Kaoru feels like everything will finally be okay now. "And I am very proud of you."

It took him less than 3 seconds to burst into tears. Proud. Proud. Someone is proud of him. He's made someone proud of him. Somebody just told him they're proud of him. He must seem so pathetic and affection starved so start crying at a sentence like that, but he's been chasing after it for so long, throwing every about himself away into oblivion just so he can hear it from someone, changing aspects of his personality to match whatever people want of him so he can hear it.

And he now realized what a big mistake he's been committing this whole time. How he was so fake about everything to earn people's pride, but when he finally got it, it was a reward for finally being himself. For finally being honest.

He could guess that even though he's only felt it from and towards his mother, that this is what love is supposed to feel like. To not have to chase and try so hard to earn the other personals approval and appreciation, that if they truly care about you they'll love you no matter what.

And that sparks the thought that Rei cares about him.

And he believes it. For once, he doesn't doubt another person's affection towards him. Because when Rei didn't question his crying, and instead pulled him into a hug, letting Kaoru cling on to him and get it all out of his system, and slowly started running his hand up and down Kaoru's back in a slow, soothing motion while he uses the other hand to comb through Kaoru's blonde locks, quietly whispering sweet nothings and comforting words such as 'it's alright', 'you're safe', 'you'll be alright', 'I'll stay here with you', and a particularly quiet 'I care about you so much', Kaoru truly does feel safe, and loved. He clings on to Rei like his life depends on it, not bothering to hold back his sobs because he really needs this, and let's himself get lost in the other boys soft whispers. 

He's reminded of his mother in so many ways. The way Rei holds him is like the way she used to, the way he runs his hands through his hair is exactly like it, and the comforting words he's saying to him resemble the tune she used to hum in his ear. He can't help but wonder if maybe this is meant to be. In some strange way, that his mother is indeed watching over him and he's always been slowly pushed towards the right path. And he thought he'd never find comfort in another person after he lost her, and locked his heart up so tightly and so far away from everyone else's reach, but now he's found it again.

Kaoru doesn't go back home that day. There was no point when it didn't even feel like home and he didn't have anyone waiting for him. He allowed Rei to take his hand and guide him wherever he wanted. He knew he'd be safe. He felt safe. He allowed Rei to take him back to his house, he allowed Rei to introduce him to his brother and found Ritsu's annoyance towards Rei to be cute. He allowed Rei to sleep next to him, He even allowed it to happen, when Rei leaned in close to capture his lips in a kiss that makes him forget every other time he's ever kissed someone. He allowed Rei to hold him when they fell asleep, around 5 am when the two finally managed to stop talking and laughing over silly exchanges and actually get to sleep. He appreciated that gesture the most because Rei had given up the comfort of his coffin in favor of not letting Kaoru sleep alone, and they both know Rei is very nocturnal so he would usually stay up around this time yet he still drifted off, holding Kaoru gently, treating him as if he's fragile like glass and he'll fall apart at any second. 

The next morning, Koga and Adonis did not hid their surprise when Kaoru and Rei arrived at practice together hand in hand. They simply exchanged looks when the two other boys didn't address the elephant in the room. There were so many questions to ask they didn't even know where to begin.

Why did you two arrive at the same time?  
Why are you holding hands?  
Why are you so damn happy today?  
Why are you so clingy towards each other today?  
Why is Kaoru actually attending practice?

So they settled for silence today.

And every other day when Kaoru actually shows up to practice, and attends class, and clings to Rei or let's Rei cling to him as if it's the most normal thing ever.

It's definitely grown into that. Kaoru found he doesn't mind spending some nights in the vampire manor, even Ritsu's gotten used to his constant appearances there. He also found he doesn't mind kissing Rei, Rei is an incredible kisser and Kaoru isn't bad himself and their kisses are usually either extremely soft and loving and comfortable, getting cut off to whisper loving words to each other or to just giggle like two school girls because they're just so very happy together. Or extremely heated and hot. In which hands get tangled up in hair and shirts get lifted up and tongues clash together as moans are exchanged and needy hands caress anything they can on the others body.  
Kaoru also found he doesn't mind practice. He likes it there and he likes how fun the atmosphere is and he loves Rei's compliments. He also found he doesn't mind Adonis and Koga as much as he thought he did. If anything, he grown to form a closer bond with both. The 4 of them were certainly a weird mix but they make it work and in Kaoru's opinion, they have an incredible relationship and it only makes their stage dynamics even better. He believes if everything continues like this, Undead will without a doubt reach the very top.

Rei and Kaoru are pda before they are human (or vampire) and they're always clinging onto each other in some way, or kissing, or sitting on each other's laps, or flirting, or giving each other looks, or being cheesy and saying cheesy shit to each other, or whatever else they decide to do because nothing is surprising anymore since the time they ended up making out during break while Adonis and Koga were right there. Right in front of their salad. Adonis and Koga have definitely grown used to it though, Adonis would go 'aww' a lot at the two of them and say they're incredibly cute together while Koga is all 'EWW' and 'GET YER TONGUE OUT OF HIS MOUTH WE ARE RIGHT DAMN HERE'. But in general they're both very supportive.

Kaoru found that when he worries less about his father, he realizes that his father barely worries about him actually considering he just sleeps at someone else's house so often and he never even gets asked where he went. Which is a great pressure off of him because he doesn't have to worry about his father as much now.

He's happy.

And even in his happiness, there's only one person he'd want to share it all with.

He quietly sets the flowers down as he usually does, it's become a routine. This time, he's smiling happily, his brighter than the sun smile is an incredible constrast with fact that the sky is grey and thundering.

He does the usual routine of telling his mom all about what he's been up to and how he's been feeling, this time full of positivity and no crying involved.

When he's done, there's one last thing he wants to do.

"Mom, I wanted to introduce you to someone." he says as he stands up and puts his hand out, inviting Rei to come closer from where he's been standing since they arrived, not wanting to intrude on a tender moment such as this one. He smiles as he takes Kaoru's hand and moves to stand next to him. Kaoru introduces Rei as his boyfriend, and his other half.

Rei introduces himself as well, although he finds the idea that he's introducing himself to no one that is actually there strange, he knows how much this means to Kaoru and how huge it is that he's brought him here. To introduce him to the family member who matters the most to him, to the place where he let's down all his guards and he's just himself. And in a way, Rei can also feel her comforting presence. He wishes he met her when she was still alive, he has a feeling she was an incredible person.

"You raised a lovely son" he says to her tombstone, turning his gaze towards Kaoru. Although Kaoru had a slight blush on his cheek, he was staring at her tombstone with so much love and adoration in his eyes. A small, soft smile on his lips.

Rei couldn't help but smile himself as he takes a hold of Kaoru's hand, and says "she would be so proud of you" quietly despite the empty place. As if the words are so sacred they must not be heard by anyone else or they'll shatter. Rei doesn't miss the way Kaoru's eyes turn teary before he looks at him, smile still present. "Thank you, Rei-kun" he says.

And it was the first time he calls him Rei-kun instead of Sakuma-san. Rei doesn't comment on it, but he remembers Kaoru's reply clearly when one day he told him he can call him Rei-kun instead of Sakuma-san. "I'll call you that.. When I earn it". And it fills Rei's heart with warmth. Kaoru fills Rei's heart with warmth. And he couldn't resist leaning in to steal a kiss from Kaoru only for Kaoru to cover his mouth and push him back "not in front of my mother, you menace" he says, and Rei laughs at that, moving back and putting his hands up in defeat.

"Shall we leave now?" Rei asks, and Kaoru gives the tombstone one last glance before he nods, taking Rei's hand again and walking away with him. Througout their walk Kaoru found himself leaning against Rei's shoulder. And when Rei offered for Kaoru to spend the night again, he doesn't hesitate to say yes and their direction changes towards Rei's house. The blonde not even bothering to go back home and pack any clothes because he knows he can wear anything in Rei's closet and he'll still be the real winner here.

He really does feel like a winner now.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos are appreciated!!! ❤️  
> If you wanna ramble with me about these boys or literally anything enstars related pls hit me up on insta @yibotonin I'm desperate for enstars mutual,, anyway thank you for reading!! <3


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